Last week was time for my physical which I hate, but I do like going to the Vet's office and seeing all the people who admire me. The first thing we had to do was stand on some platform that had a display with some digital numbers somewhere on it. I hate standing still, especially on something that the humans want me to stand still on so I put up a real fight.
After the technician was satisfied that she and Dad had me as still as I was ever going to get they gave up and she wrote something on a piece of paper and we went on to the next room and waited for the vet to do the physical and give me my shots. I was not a happy puppy at this time.
The vet entered the room and did not look too happy ( I thought she was just jealous that she was'nt as cool as me) and started to talk to Dad in some words I did not listen to and then Dad asked, you mean Remy is Phat? My ears perked up to listen to the the Vet's response, knowing that many great things were going to be said about me. The Vet nodded and then said yes, Remy is overweight and needs to lose some pounds.
What is going on here, I went from being Phat to fat in a matter of minutes. I think the DR. is wrong, I am just big boned, have too much fur and did not stand on the scale correctly. So what that I steal ALL of Flash's Happy Hearts cookies when Dad is not looking, get a grilled beef rib bone every week, get a handful of cookies at bed time and in the morning and steal more of Flash's cookies when Dad gives us each an assortment when he leaves for work in the morning. Dad gives me and Flash the exact same amount of food and treats but I guess I wind up with more.
I am PHAT, cool, hip groovy, amazing and King of all I see; I am not FAT.
Well, maybe I could stand to lose a few L B S but the Vet needs to remember my teeth and paws are much bigger than Flash's, not a threat; just a fact.
Remy ....... who is sorry for the bad joke, sitting around the house (sorry Ammy).
Nobody better interfere with my cookies or they may lose a hand, a house or I may join the circus.